“That’s why you’re on your own now! Nobody else is ever gonna put up with you the way I have!” My Ex.
I live with my ex. It is a complicated situation and usually pretty amicable…but not this morning.
I remember when I used to blame the other person for everything that went wrong in a relationship. In this situation though, I honestly try to see where I’ve been wrong and check myself. I admit to the things that are my responsibility but my ex hasn’t been able to do that yet. She sees herself as a victim of me and my will.
Her reasons for leaving the relationship range from my mood swings endangering her physical health to my apparent lack of empathy. I understand that those are her reasons and I have to respect them. I just wish that she could SEE me the way she wants me to SEE her. I try…but apparently I don’t.
Being dumped hurts. I feel that I failed this relationship. Correction. Sometimes I feel that I’ve failed but I know that isn’t true. I am moving on but like I said, it’s complicated.
I don’t even know why I’m writing all of this. I guess I just need to vent since my ex doesn’t want to hear anything I have to say. It sucks that I can’t get her to listen to me but she expects me to listen to her. Her justification for this is that I always preach for at least half an hour and she doesn’t want to hear it. Well, I feel the same way but I’ve listened to her preach to me many times without complaint. I guess I should’ve.
Oh, well. My Gratitude Journey continues and this is Day 8. What a way to start, eh?
I am grateful. Even for this early rising discourse, I am grateful. Weird, eh?
2 thoughts on “Almost Ok Now.”
Love! It’s hard feeling like you give so much and the receiving end is not recognizing your efforts. Even more so when you feel like they do have a point on some level, even if they are not willing to exist in that space with you, the space of mutual understanding.
You get it. Thank you.