Oh, Snap! I Almost Quoted Bobby McFerrin.

There are few times that I can quote my mother and DMX at the same time but…

“ya’ll gone make me lose my mind. Up in here! Up in here!”

The best thing about teaching is working with the kids. I love the kids…even the so called ‘bad’ ones. I enjoy their company. Kids are real. They’re honest even when they don’t mean to be. It’s the adults that I could sometimes do without.

I love active parents. Even if I don’t see them everyday,  I know that they care about their children. I’m lucky enough to work, predominantly,  at a place where there are a lot of active parents. Of course there are the trifling ones but hey, the good outnumber the bad.

Most of the teachers are cool. They work hard and seem fair. I like quite a few of them actually. It just gets hard when I have to leave my safe ‘teacher mode’ and switch to ‘concerned parent’. That’s the most difficult part of the gig. Subbing at my son’s school has taught me some things about boundaries and space.

I want to believe that every one of the people my sons come into contact with each day is a good person. Especially at school where they spend most of their time. When you work with people every day, you see them at their best and worst. The school is a good school, my son has a good teacher and that’s all I want to know. I won’t work at The Round Head Boy’s school next year. I think we both could use some space.

Since I will be teaching full time in the upper grades next year, (Thank You, Creator! Thank You, Universe!), I am ready to dive into that  new energy.  I’m excited to be on the fast track to full professional certification. What’s not to like about more money, benefits and steady income. I’m keeping my eyes on the prize! Even though I started this post with the intention to vent about the crazy Sh*t that happened within the past two days, I’m glad that I didn’t.

*Deep Breath*

Active happiness on deck. Napoleon Hill, I thank you. Your incessant preaching on having a positive outlook, pleasing personality and willingness to go the extra mile, works. I am an choosing to be happy and positive. I am Thankful for this lesson.

Yay! I feel better now. It works!

Meet Steve. He’s In A Dress.

Ok…so sometimes I’m a boi. I never realize it’s happening until I catch myself, for lack of a better way of saying it, thinkin’ like a dude. As a matter of fact, I’m being Steve right now and it took me by surprise.


Steve is me, of course. I was in an online group and someone  posted the question, ” Do you name your alter egos?” At the time I hadn’t but decided to answer with the name “Steve”. It’s easy to remember so it stuck.

me and redd

I should’ve known Steve would emerge sooner or later. My dudes (homies, bois, etc…whatever you call masculine female friends you’re not sleeping with) are starting to hit me up again. Some I haven’t talked to in years. I’m enjoying the energy. Even in my high femmiest attire, my real homies don’t hit on me. It’d be like hitting on your drag queen cousin.  All of my boi friends are super cute. I’ve rolled around with a couple of them and that’s cool. They didn’t know I was a dude then.


I guess they know now.

A few years ago, my homie and me (lol) were sitting in a lesbian party ogling girls. She was wearing a button up and khakis. I was wearing something flowy and yellow…and lipgloss. I said something that made her turn and look me as if for the first time and say, “Damn. Crystal…you’re a dude.”  I simply smiled my girliest smile and said, ” I know, right?”


Although I can be bit of  a dude, I am still attracted to masculine women. I’m also attracted to feminine women. I’m fluid like that…and comfortably so. It can be confusing for those women who like a more clearly defined type but like the song goes, ” Sometimes you feel like a nut. Sometimes, You Don’t”.  I’m that nut sometimes…and sometimes, I’m not .

boi elmyfriend

So, ladies…I’ll get in ya. Fellas, I’ll get in ya, too…even if I’m wearing a dress when I do it. Don’t get weird about it. It’ll do ya some good to roll around in a blouse. Ya know, a feminine top. On the other hand, I do feel like bottoming out sometimes, too. It depends on my mood.

I am a Cancer after all.

sunkissed bwbeach happy

Now, Ain’t That Good News?

It’s Tuesday and I’m still humming The Smiths, “Charming Man”. I also just recently read the lyrics and the words took on a different meaning. Who’s been singing a song for years without realizing what the lyrics meant? This guy!


Today I read to kids for the first half of the day…and it’s still my favorite substitute teacher gig. The kids, even the older ones, love having stories read to them. It’s fun and I hope that my love of reading is rubbing off on them. I think it is.

Speaking of reading, I want to catch up on RuPaul’s Drag Race. This new season has passed me by and I sure could use some Queen Time. I love everything about that show. The make up, glamour and cat fights…Oh, My!


Today feels good. I am in LOVE with my new way of thinking. It works with my self diagnosed ADD. As long as I have four main tasks and a couple of options, I’m good. My attention is scattered and focused at the same time.

I used to laugh at people who employed life coaches. Now I know better. It’s not that I didn’t know what to do, I just didn’t do it. Now, I feel like one of those super dedicated athletes. Gotta do it for Coach! But…I know I’m really doing it for myself.  Who better to do anything for in this life?


On a side note…somebody’s daughter needs to be mine for a weekend.


I’m just putting that out there.

I Love My Awesome Friends!

What an auspicious weekend, eh? Got The Jabari Bros. back together again  and I’m currently lying down on the couch watching (and listening to) them play video games. They asked me to play but I have about a ten minute attention span for that stuff and they know it. So, I told them to give me a couple of hours to rest. That’s the best I can do.


I love this new journey!Last week was really intense but I survived it. Bought some pinot grigio and she’s chillin’ in the fridge. A Root Chakra binaural meditation is playing while I type this. Mom is chillin’…and recuperating from my awesome friend Vivian’s Topsy Turvy Tea Party.

I’ve never been to high tea…although growing up in the south, I have had plenty of the iced, sweetened variety. In true Vivian fashion, it was an Alice in Wonderland themed tea party …at a tea house. I’m still gagging on the fabulousness of it all.

I was The March Hare. In true Cancer fashion, I decided to be one of the random characters and thought, “I’ll wear a long sleeve shirt, a vest, a skirt , some polka dot or other textured white tights and grab some heels. No sweat!”

But it’s never that simple, is it girls. lol

SO…I had everything but a vest and the tights. I found a vest. Gave up on the tights and made it to the party on time. Vivian’s niece had abandoned a pair of bunny ears. I was now the March Hare. Magic!


I Love Costume Parties and I love Alice in Wonderland. This party was the stuff of dreams…or trips down the rabbit hole. There were pretty, long stemmed red and white rosebuds on the table with signs saying simply, “Smell Me”. Of course I did! We talked, drank tea and consumed lots of finger sandwiches. The hostess taught me how to eat scones the English way. I now have a craving for clotted cream and lemon curd…yum!

I Love My Friends! This party was like the delicious cherry on top of my wonder filled weekend. I am truly grateful for my life.

An Awesomely Amazing Art Day!

I had an AMAZING day painting at Art Attack for Ft. Lauderdale Art Walk. First of all, my new art gurus Ed and Steph are Soooooooooooooo Cool. Shameless plug for their gallery in these words. They gave me space. Real Space. I’ve done live painting before but this was by far the most area I’ve been given. I was so happy that I neglected to take a bunch of pictures…but I did take a few of the guitar case I worked on last night.


I met so many cool people! I love hanging out with artists and talking art and learning stuff.  Ideas flow. Drinks flow. Coffee flows. In fact, I don’t even know why I am awake this early except maybe the coffee and alcohol combination from last night is still having a party in my tummy.

table dancing

After the art show, I met my friend Heather at a pub to watch a Morrissey and The Smiths cover band. The pub is in the ‘trendy’ downtown area so I had to do a quick change in my truck out of paint covered clothes into something clean…but I forgot my club shoes. Honey badger (insert Crystal where ever you read honey badger) don’t care. Honey Badger don’t give a shit. I walked right up in there with my paint covered Sketchers. I’m an artist. lol.

Today is my friend’s Alice in Wonderland themed birthday tea party. So excited! I gotta get up and get my look together. Hmmm…what to wear?