Horoscopes…Why So Cryptic Today?`

“Some may be dealing with the stress of wanting to be in a relationship but also wanting to be an independent person. A balance must be maintained. Speak up for what you want, but avoid impulsive remarks or judgments. It will take time to sort things out. Avoid appearing needy.”


What the hell am I supposed to do with that?

Ok…this is my Chinese Astrology horoscope. I am apparently an Ox. Being of strong back and big heart, I am built for the work…right?

To add to my confusion, this is what my Sun Sign in Cancer horoscope told me to do today.  Look at this *$&&@:

“Something about silence doesn’t seem right to you today, Cancer. Keep talking. Eventually someone will say something meaningful. Latch on to lucrative ideas and keep your ears open for new opportunities. The stranger you pass on the street while going for coffee could be your new best friend. Strike up a conversation with the person standing next to you in line.”

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Now how am I supposed to avoid ‘appearing needy’ when I’m striking up random conversations in line? In line where? Walmart? Not a good idea. At the grocer’s? Maybe. Ok…so I’ll try to not seem desperate, even though I would love a date, yet talk to random strangers in line at Publix. Crazytown!

Maybe I’m over thinking it. Let’s try another.

“The current celestial environment encourages you to let out your nonconformist self – deeply hidden though it may be – and allow the world see that you are capable of being carefree and spontaneous. This will do a certain relationship in which you are involved a world of good, and may even rejuvenate it. Everything needs room to breathe and grow, so make sure you give this gift to yourself.”

Soooo…The Universe is giving me permission to be an unrestrained lunatic. I can dig it. But, how much of ME can the WORLD take? I mean…I scare away the tentative. That could be a good thing though.

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Alright. I’m heading to the gym to do my oh so dynamic thirty minute walk to loud music intentionally designed to scare away gym queens. I do not like them Sam I Am. Hmm…maybe I should at least turn the volume down and smile a bit.


Naw…I doubt that I’ll meet my soulmate at the gym. Could happen but…the chances are slim.


A Rose is a Rose…but a Yellow Rose Means Friends WIth Benefits.

Sometimes I feel randy. This would be one of those times. I also feel a bit lazy but not about gettin’ some summer lovin’.  I think all of that sacral chakra work has activated my love bone.


I’d taken down all of my dating profiles. Recently, I opened new ones. I like to make a fresh start. Old page, old energy. New page, new booty… oops! I mean, new energy.

It’s Solar Plexus Chakra week. I’m excited to see what new adventure this leg of my journey will bestow upon me. Root and Sacral were like night and day. This cycle has not been boring. No siree, Bob.

I painted today and did some light research. I went to the gym twice to take two separate thirty minute walks. Low impact, twice a day feels better than trying to work against my exercise ADD. I also thought a lot about girls. I think I’m ready to date again. Maybe date is the wrong word. I think I’m ready to get steadily laid. Yep. Now seems more honest. That’s the best policy, right?


Ha! We’ll see if I get any nibbles on my dating pages before I answer for sure.

ArtWalk was AMAZING.

Man…Am I ever glad that I was at ArtWalk last night. It was an awesome (as well as profitable) evening! My sacral chakra is pleased.  I am So Grateful. Thank You, Infinite Intelligence!

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The rain ended and the streets were dry by the time I got downtown. Ed, one of the owners of Art Attack, told me he’d spent three hours sweeping water into the street drains. His effort was not in vain. The MASS District was pristine.

I set  up my table between two awesome artists, Sam Cooper and DTech respectively. There were several vendors this time. The vendors are a draw because attendance had more than doubled. I was super psyched. Definitely worth the price of a space. Everyone sold something. That’s a first at any event I’ve worked.

An awesome couple bought “Everybody Loves the Sunshine”. Such a cool story, too! The guy, Steven, came over and bought one page for his girlfriend. As I was preparing his purchase, we started talking about Roy Ayers and how both parts actually complete the piece…but he could only buy one page. So his girlfriend, Marjorie (?) came and purchased the other page for him. Both pages went to the same home. I am so happy! That was one of my favorite paintings. So grateful that it went to an awesome home.

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I met an awesome array of artistic folk and spent time with my art homies. It really was a great night.

So excited for the July Artwalk! My birthday month…Yay!

Rainy Day for ArtWalk…Aww, Man!

It’s fitting that today would be rainy. I’ve been feeling so up and down this week. The rain is just the opportunity I need to either give up or get my ass in gear.


I’m sitting here about an hour before I have to get set up for the show, with ice on my knee and Earl in my ear. This sacral chakra week is a SHARP contrast to root chakra week. My root must be relatively clear and balanced. My sacral chakra? Lord…it’s been a hot mess. It’s been a hot mess but still a healing experience. Lucky for me I’ve learned to glean the lesson from the menagerie of madness known as chakra healing. I have some issues with sexuality/sensuality that need to be addressed. I’ve been creative…but my energy hasn’t been at ten thousand like it has been for the past few months. I’m at about half that.

No matter how blah I may currently feel, I AM excited about ArtWalk tonight. I’m excited to paint and talk to people. I am excited to share my work with folk. I am excited. I just need to emote EXCITEMENT. Does that make sense?


Anyway, tonight after live painting, I’m heading to Miami with Heather to see our favorite Smiths cover band, Ordinary Boys.  I think we could both a beer and a dance tonight. When I spoke with her earlier she was tangled in the throes of post rain congestion.


Deep Sigh.

Wonder Twin Powers, Activate!

Form of a giant bottle of vodka!

Shape of a post night out doughnut!

Nonsense? Yes.

But I feel good about it.


Once Again…Freud Was Right.

Don’t get me wrong. I am no great fan of Dr. Freud. It’s just that in this one case, I’ve proven the whole anal/oral thing to be true…somewhat. I’m not sure if I even really know more about the concept except what I’ve heard in passing or read as an internet meme. But, see how anal I can be? I’m correcting myself while writing a blog post about correcting myself. How circular! How Cancerian.

Anyway, my last post was rife with errors that just couldn’t go unaddressed. I will however just announce a general apology instead of digging up every wretched error. It’s not that deep. So…I, Crystal Jaudon, do sincerely apologize for any and all: grammatical, mechanical and/ or errors in syntax present in my previous post.

That should take care of it.

Thank You.

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