Horoscopes…Why So Cryptic Today?`

“Some may be dealing with the stress of wanting to be in a relationship but also wanting to be an independent person. A balance must be maintained. Speak up for what you want, but avoid impulsive remarks or judgments. It will take time to sort things out. Avoid appearing needy.”

What the hell am I supposed to do with that?

Ok…this is my Chinese Astrology horoscope. I am apparently an Ox. Being of strong back and big heart, I am built for the work…right?

To add to my confusion, this is what my Sun Sign in Cancer horoscope told me to do today.  Look at this *$&&@:

“Something about silence doesn’t seem right to you today, Cancer. Keep talking. Eventually someone will say something meaningful. Latch on to lucrative ideas and keep your ears open for new opportunities. The stranger you pass on the street while going for coffee could be your new best friend. Strike up a conversation with the person standing next to you in line.”

Now how am I supposed to avoid ‘appearing needy’ when I’m striking up random conversations in line? In line where? Walmart? Not a good idea. At the grocer’s? Maybe. Ok…so I’ll try to not seem desperate, even though I would love a date, yet talk to random strangers in line at Publix. Crazytown!

Maybe I’m over thinking it. Let’s try another.

“The current celestial environment encourages you to let out your nonconformist self – deeply hidden though it may be – and allow the world see that you are capable of being carefree and spontaneous. This will do a certain relationship in which you are involved a world of good, and may even rejuvenate it. Everything needs room to breathe and grow, so make sure you give this gift to yourself.”

Soooo…The Universe is giving me permission to be an unrestrained lunatic. I can dig it. But, how much of ME can the WORLD take? I mean…I scare away the tentative. That could be a good thing though.

Alright. I’m heading to the gym to do my oh so dynamic thirty minute walk to loud music intentionally designed to scare away gym queens. I do not like them Sam I Am. Hmm…maybe I should at least turn the volume down and smile a bit.

Naw…I doubt that I’ll meet my soulmate at the gym. Could happen but…the chances are slim.